Since my novel is done (again), edited (again) and edited (againandagainandagain) AND because I'm shoving my anal, type-a side out the window for a moment, I am now querying agents to see if someone wants to loooove me.
(Note: I am shoving my type-a personality out the window because, if I didn't, the novel and query would NEVER BE PERFECT ENOUGH to send out. So. I am reminding myself that it IS good enough to send out now and, besides, if I don't, the Engineer would strangle me.)
I've Googled the google out of "how to write a query letter" and spoken to other authors about this. I've sent it to them, gotten feedback and sent it off to agents. I'm not expecting a response anytime soon, as most websites and people have told me AT LEAST 2-3 weeks. No problem... in that respect. But writing the letter? PROBLEM.
I actually am NOT having an abnormal amount of trouble with the blurb and summary of my book. But the about me section? UGH. I HATE trying to summarize myself because I sound LAME. I mean, nothing screams "publish me" like "overweight housewife and mother of four who writes YA romance while her children are at TKD, cello and speech therapy!" Oh yeah. Living the life.
I kinda want to write something like this:
Laura is an ex-Catholic school English/literature teacher, wife, and mother of four. She has a BSE from UNIVERISTY and has published many super-awesome articles about parenting, which makes her sound like she knows what she's doing. (Spoiler: she doesn't.) She will read anything with print on it, especially if it means she can put off folding laundry. She considers Facebook "networking" and Pinterest "menu planning." Her daily goals include drinking a pot of coffee, embarrassing her kids by car dancing in the car pool line, threatening to sell the dog, cooking meals no one will eat and writing young adult novels while waiting at speech therapy/tkd/cello lessons. She can be found on-line at Slaying Dragons, WaldenMommy and her writing blog.... or hiding in the laundry room away from the kids.
Instead, I'm super professional, or try to be, which makes Type-A me worrying that I am giving them what they way but am not STANDING OUT enough. And I should STAND OUT. Ugh. See, this is what happens when I go out of my comfort zone... I don't feel comfortable!
Oh, well, on ward and upward!